In fact, when you’re in a rush to reconnect with your loved one, distance can sometimes cause your heart (and other attractive parts of your body) to “fall out of love“.
But let’s face it: long distance relationships can be tough. Maintaining a healthy sexual relationship when you and your partner are in different cities, states, countries or even continents is not easy even under the best of circumstances.
We spoke to several sex experts about their experiences with long-distance relationships, lust, and the most pressing dilemmas in between. If you want to “go further” with long distance love and learn how to keep that sexy spark alive, read on!
Dealing with common problems in long-distance relationships
First, start by letting go of self-judgment and external judgment.
“Don’t feel like your long-distance relationship has to be a certain way,” says Javai da BAE, MD, sex educator and founder of The Millennial Sexpert. “It’s your relationship – as a couple, you decide what you want and how you want it defined.“
In other words, focus on what makes your relationship with your partner unique and enjoyable, and let the distractions go away.
However, tension between two people can certainly create feelings of distance and separation, especially if there are no plans to be together in the future.
“But when there’s a personal date on the calendar (even if it’s not expected), it reminds both parties that they’ll be together again, giving them hope and motivation to break up.” Elizabeth Fedrick, owner of Evolve Consulting & Consulting. Behavioral health services in Phoenix, Arizona and the host Relatable: Relationships Unfiltered.
In addition, anger at not being able to meet or participate in worldly affairs is sometimes unconscious.
Dr. Fedrick explains: “Long-distance relationships create barriers that prevent each other from helping each other with everyday tasks. This can sometimes create tension and conflict when one or both partners. feel isolated or overwhelmed by everyday tasks.“
To combat this, actions always speak louder than words. Simple gestures can be done quickly, such as “bringing lunch to your partner (via food delivery), sending household items from an online store, hiring them to help with services ( cleaning, gardening, etc.) and try to find other ways. Federico said, “Even if you can’t help each other directly, give.”
That way, you can still “show your face” and share your habits and meet each other’s needs.
Coping with loneliness and sexual frustration in LDRs
Sometimes, no matter how good you are, you can still feel lonely, especially if you haven’t hugged or touched your partner in a while. Also, there are times when we don’t feel erotic when we’re “not ready for the camera” or when we long to meet or talk to our partner.
“It’s very important to be sensitive about it,” Javai said. “Don’t be afraid to open up or be as open to them as you are.”
“Doing regular video calls to discuss the day’s events, interesting or challenging, and making an emotional connection is certainly helpful,” says Dr. Fedrick.
He added: “It’s important to try to accept the reality of the situation, including a long-distance relationship. If the distance between you and your loved one is difficult and even frustrating. , eventually facing that reality will make it worse.
Regular checks will also help in this regard.
“It’s important to know what works and what doesn’t,” says Javai. “Ask your partner questions like, ‘Do you think I’m telling you what I think? What else can I do?”
Dr. Federico also emphasizes the importance of staying positive: “Try to focus on the joy of meeting in the moment and the joy of foreplay from a distance.”
When it comes to foreplay, you might be surprised how distance can open up exciting possibilities, making your intimacy feel purposeful and privileged, says Javai.
Create intimate and long distance relationships
Long distance love always requires creativity.
“Try doing something different for your virtual day each month,” says Javai to avoid distractions. (The date can of course be rated PG or X as you like.)
“Whether it’s strip dancing, cooking dinner, or video chatting with holiday decorations, the most important thing is to have fun,” Javai added.
Additionally, “some couples prefer to engage in risky writing activities, including sexual texting, to increase sexual intimacy,” says Dr. Federico. Instead of scrolling through social media in vain, carry technology in your pocket for romantic adventures.
Are words not good? Don’t stress yourself out! Your enthusiasm and desire are important.
“Sexting is awesome,” says Javai. “No need to be complicated – be naughty students!”
How to maintain intimacy in a long distance relationship
“By ensuring that this is a topic of regular discussion, couples can maintain and/or explore sexual intimacy at a distance,” says Dr. Federico. “This could include talking about your career choices, new things you’d like to try, past experiences you’ve enjoyed, and so on.“
Just like direct sex, communication and openness are essential to good sex in a long-distance relationship. But, of course, there are other nuances to long-distance sex.
Dr. Federick adds, “It’s important to determine each partner’s preference for phone sex or sexting. Just as people have a sexual preference for intimacy, people do. have some preferences when it comes to foreplay. They’re more like or interested.“
So don’t assume that what you do in person can be translated remotely; Check and ask your partner what they want – and make sure you give them what they want.
There is no benefit to being in the same room, you must provide grace and freedom. Also, don’t lose your sense of humor if the screen freezes to an O-Face or hit a cat in the heat of the moment – laughter can be as exhilarating as orgasm.
But if you really want to orgasm on your next virtual date, the world of tech sex is sure to satisfy your sex drive!
Best remote control sex toys for long distance relationships
Remote control toys have come a long way in the last two decades, which means it’s now quicker and easier to enjoy dirty encounters with your partner – no matter what. tell them where they are.
“Your partner can control a lot of things from their phone,” says Fedrick. “This tactic can make you feel like you’re ‘sharing’ sex, even when you’re not together.”
While the options are great, all of the products listed below can be controlled remotely through an app: for example, you can control your partner and/or them can control you, to optimize long distance dating.